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Cross Veil

Crossveil is an accumulation of history, lore and records all involved in the worlds of Aeons and Gaia. It is also a system I use to document studies and practices on topics such as magicks, tech, philosophy, fauna, herbalism techniques, etc. A frontpage for the Veil, an online grimoire, and some other fun extras soon to come. Yippee ♥

Along with updates and journals, course.

Everything can and will be hazy. Things can and will seem straight from reality at one point and simply dreamlike another. I ask that you read with heart in mind. Take into consideration how you're feeling in the moment before letting teachings and topics sit. These are simply records. Some say mythology, others say pure scripture. Whatever conclusion you come to in your heart, is your conclusion. Again, I dearly hope you find what your looking for.

Anyway..

Consider this as a formal invitation to "Cross Labs". Your designation with be..

"Sinner".

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎

hi, it me.

hewwo, hi, halwo

i'm kyt (she/her/fae/lunarian, 02/14/1994). i do all sorts of things (as i'm sure you'll find out) such as:

• Art (Mostly 2D Digital)
• VA Work
• a looot of coding
• 3D Modeling and Rigging
• Video Edits

...y-..you get it i'm sure. etc etc

↟˖𓍢ִ໋˚

i've moved a lot over the years and i'm currently back in CA. a lot of my childhood is a big aurora filled blur of moments. i'd go on walks through untouched woods, let my feet drift with the river's current, skate til the only air filling my lungs was the pure, crisp oxygen flying back at me. i'm a big, big enthusiast of the nature of things. how everything, even when it's inanimate, even when it's made in VR, has energy to it. Aether. but i guess to put it in a """normal""" way, i'm a aspiring forager. i'm actively learning bushcraft techniques. i'm a fledging to amateur herbalist (and the interest and passion of that is seen in my works sometimes...iunno i'm 99% sure i'm very autistic. haven't been diagnosed officially but i mean....come on. lol). i really don't know how my relationship with nature could be described. it's like a humbling feeling but an invigorating feeling as well? i feel that words can only express so much. Which is why i guess i turned to music first.

✗♡✗♡

so like i've told a few of my friends and i guess to you, "Sinner". i have this synesthesia-like relationship with music, with sounds. i know a lot of my art or my materials, icons, etc tend to have this blurple like color. this color of mystery, light and dark, twilight. but it's because I see these colors and i hear those waves, i taste the rainbow seasalt ice cream. and with the music i create, it matches this feeling of being underneath it all. when i hear a D Major 7 on a guitar or piano, i see this color "____" because with all the notes combined it mixes into that. and it's funny because i was in school for a long time for music. i would do sightreading and jazz stuff and i couldn't explain it to anyone until now(until i was confident in myself tbh). so, of course, with this in mind, i was really into music. we are inseperable. to give an example, there was a time where i was washing my face and it was raining. the rain sounds like greybluegreen. i sat there, listening to the soft light taps on the windowsill. eventually, the drops turned into a musical. like actual patterns. a symphony of pale seagreens and deep heather blues, rap-tap-tapping in my eardrums...

didn't even get to genres yet..

i gravitate to ambient everything, ukg, breakbeats/breakcore, hi-tech, hit em. d-dude i fuckin' hate genres!! anything that gets me all "i'm leaving my corporeal shell" i'm down for. and i'm always up for reccommendations! ...Goodness! >:o

on top of that, my love for art is just as much !

we are in a polycule relationship and we wuv each other very much, mwah mwah ♥

since like the beginning of time or something, i've been absolutely mesmerized by how we create things with just these flesh machines. like the fact that i can think of an apple and put it on paper or model it into a 3D space or just painstakingly recreate this fruit if i had the equipment and know-how to clone. OR TAKE A SEED AND PLANT IT AND WATCH IT GROW.

anyways, i love art. traditional, digital, 2D, 3D, the special 4D option. all o' that. i spend hours, waking and sleeping, just loving the fact that i can create and experience other's "emotion". to give a down to earth point of view, i was one of the aloof ones. i kept to my sketch books, writing down ideas, practicing drawing panels, aspiring to be a mangaka (not officially, fuck that lol). and of course, like most, i got lead down the wrong paths, discouraged to go after what drew me in. like an oil painting, i was a mess of colors shaped into a picture of a so-called glorified disciple. it forever leaves a gash of doubt, anxiety and disrepair. yet, i still create.

⌨

speaking of creating, i fell in love with A+ and Networking work when i first got my hands on a Dell Optiplex. it was so dusty but i loved the thing. i would get on that pc filled with dust, 4GBs of ram, and dreams and just explore the web. i got hands on experience doing little web projects with my friends on geocities, gaiaonline and myspace. whenever the pc would crap out i'd immediately get started on just doing basic troubleshooting and cleaning it as best as i could, feeling like i was nikon from hackers or johnny mnemonic(hella dork shit ahaha). and yhea sometimes a drive would be dead for good or a vga would be fried or i'd break a screen by "accident"(you'd do the same thing if you were a 12 year old playing mabinogi on a toshiba satellite at 15 fps), but through it all my love for all tech never really died. even when it became my job.

if i had to point at who motivated me with my adventures into cyberspace, i'd say it was my old friend Jojo. (nonbinary to the T, even before we had a definition. supreme L from Deathnote fan, absolutely crazy on the vinyl. maybe i'll put their music somewhere here, who knows. )

they showed me things like windows millenium edition and like OS mods! like that windows98 edgy version that was super sick. but if i had an issue i couldn't really figure out, they were there in my corner. from stepmania custom maps of Emergency by BT from the "These Hopeful Machines" album, to wardriving around town, to dumpster diving for 500 GB drives! Truly a real one and with that i was just immersed in lain-esque builds, frou frou airy edits of kowloon city, boogiepop phantom in general! repeating A Furrow Dub when I sleep and drifting on my bladerunner skates on the sounds of Pone by Rei Harakami.

i was the ghost in the machine before we considered it.

seriously, miss you everyday..you'd hate the state of things but you would've thrived i just know it..

•ﻌ•ฅ

yes. i'm a sonic fan. i was into swat catz, goof troop, chip n' dale, the show fuckin' BONKERS. just to preface. anyways. yhea i got into furry stuff at a pretty early age but i didn't really know what that was or the community until i connected with my irl friend, Operaptor (hella funny sharkdoggo and shuffle buddy. super sweetheart, huge PLUR enjoyer. absolutely chaotic, but that's the best part.). never really had enough money for a suit, or hell an idea for what type of animal resonated with me. hence, ethereal cabbit wolf chimera thingy. but i would still be so mesmerized by what was possible and i'd think, "wait you could just do that..??"

like genuinely think about how freely that would be for a young kid to just think that you could be a fox, a wolf, a bird in space, a serval??, a KEMONO??? the possibilities are endless, just like most things. and it just stuck with me like a lot of things. "you can just dress that way, no issue?" "is that what you call crossplay?" "my friends are just chill about living together like that...?" like you are you. you are an entity. and whatever that entity is, is you. and that's beautiful to think about..

so of course being on second life and living a second life as a kemono with my friends changed me. enlightened me. being introduced to all of halley labs, russelbuck, S3RL. (this chick really can't stop talking about music.)getting my first clip-on tail at a con and just making that apart of my fit for a school year. i denied it, of course, when pressed because i didn't wanna be messed with. but i held that knowledge with me to this day. and i don't think i'll ever be able to let that go. i still think of myself as a part of the Vitalic family and Operaptor will always be right there on top of the list too for being the fuckin' homie.

miss you too, my dearest friend, our Tree. i hope you're glowing bright out there, jumpstyling in your fave nebula. you'd love all the amazing music we got as of late.. framedrag would've hooked you.♥

𓍊𓋼𓆏𓋼𓍊

it's time. to talk. about. drugs.

so, my relationship with religions has always been strained. no so much for spirituality, because i believe those are two completely different things. religion is organized groups, guiding you down a path they dictate is good for you and it usually ends up with you being an outcast or a heretic *gasp* whenever you don't fully agree with the higher ups. yes, religion is a good starting point in ways, but to follow it from i to t isn't what should be done.

spirituality on the other hand is your relationship with the energies around us. you can feel it through religion yes, but it doesn't explain the deep natural (or unnatural if you're not taught to look for it) feelings that you get in specific areas in life. feeling something in a room or a patch of land, avoiding fairy rings. hearing, feeling, thinking of things, ideas, moments that seem like just coincidence or deja vu. when you tap into these moments more, you start to notice more of what our world has in store. how simply ethereal and magical our world already is, we just turn a blind eye to it.

now with that established, i have to mention that i've taken all sorts of recreational treats in the past. "i go to parties 'n shit." was my motto. but i didn't really know. i didn't want to know y'know? i just wanted to forget until i was numb. dumb kid antics :3 going to raves was like a missionary journey for me. connecting with liked minded entities and kindred spirits. X, LSD, Smileys, Shrooms. All were friends and yet when i felt these calls, i would just freak out. i'd sleep as fast as i could, avoid it entirely even though i was attuned at such a young age to these signals. it only took being brave and being by myself for a while for things to click. one day, the dots just...connected. yes, i was sober funny enough. it became clear to me that i was needed. i was being told something but i just couldn't understand or didn't want to understand.

so...i let go of my past grievances, thoughts of being """normal""", my moments of doubt...

and for the first time in a long time, after the fallout, i felt myself breathe. and i knew that things wouldn't be the same from there. i couldn't go back after reaching at the time, a pure understanding of self. i knew that i needed to stop being scared and just go in Kingdom Hearts these practices of shadowwork, of of believing in the work i was doing, believing in my capabilities despite what society says about magicks. and i haven't looked back since. i have never felt more entwined with interests before in my life until recently. i'm genuinely so happy to tinker, to fix, to create, to explore. to feel this place, to feel gaia like i've always wanted to. all because i said, "fuck it. what's the worse that can happen, really?" Lol

this is my reason why i do this. why i live in the ways that i do. my reason "why". and "how" i got here. what we can create, what we can find with our senses and without them, it's all there. from the blades of grass we brush across to the electric winds in your favorite cyberspace. it's all there, connected. how could i miss out on that..? how could anyone? ♥

so we might as well remember, that we will die someday. so why not live?

物の哀れ..Memento Mori..it's all so beautiful, mm?